Ep. 255 5 Tips for Developing Emotional Intelligence
Secure your bottom line. Joe Pici provides insights for improving emotional intelligence, a critical element in building and maintaining relationships and influence with clients.
Get ready for an unfair advantage over your competition. This is The Sales Edge podcast. Where globally recognized sales expert and trainer Joe Pici helps you sharpen your skills for booking more appointments and closing more deals. And now here’s your host Joe Pici.
Today. We’re going to discuss a major factor for sales, negotiation, business ownership, conflict resolution, Account management, collections whenever there’s an interaction between two people. But first, we want to welcome you to the sales ad podcast. I am your host Joe Pici. We especially want to thank our sponsors Pici and Pici, which is a speaking coaching training consulting firm. Absolutely. We help our clients gain an unfair advantage over their competitors. Getting from their target markets, rebuild their business and also sell more virtually.
Not calm as our membership platform. Every Thursday, at a time out there live doing a group coaching group speaking at or just questions and answers. It’s a great format. Check that thing out checks film or virtual out. There’s so many things on there that are for you and also a massive ecourse coming down the pike. So soon. We’ll let you know about it. But today, we’re talking about a topic that can make you, or Or break you how people perceive you, how you do business with people how you interact with people. The topic is emotional intelligence. And where this came from was. I, you know, I do a lot of training speaking to coaching with respect to negotiation conflict, resolution sales, business ownership, and a common denominator keeps coming up, the importance of emotional intelligence. Yes.
Hey, I was at a company in Lakeland big trucking company a great client there. So they’re on the growth or exploding and they asked me to come in and help them to do what negotiate higher profit margins. And so, you know, you can see so many times when you talk about the word negotiate you can look at that as a negative and adversarial when it should be a collaboration. So. You think about what emotional intelligent says? It’s the ability really to handle your emotions. It’s the ability to understand and relate to others. There’s five fundamental characteristics involved in emotional intelligence. The first one is self-awareness to be self-aware is to understand our own emotions and keep them under control while we’re making.
Important decisions. It’s so as you’re assessing yourself. If you did a one to ten, ten being you have complete Mastery. One means while I have so much work to do, start to assess yourself on the emotional intelligence. Scale. The second one is self regulations. This is when you control your outer. Emotions and impulses and you do not become aggressive. You know, this is we think before we respond. So, instead of being reactionary, we take our time and we respond, we get our emotions in check. We don’t react to things and we are adaptable to Sudden Change. Well, that’s a big one. Anytime you get into a an interaction with another.
The human being whether it is negotiation conflict, resolution sales, business ownership management. It’s going to be change that come down, the pike between people and how your emotional intelligence is, will determine your success. The third one is motivation. When we execute with emotional intelligence. It increases our personal self motivation. We’re excited about today. We’re excited about success. We’re not put off by Sudden Change. We Embrace challenges as a positive, not a negative, you know, do you see the glass half? Empty or sap have full, every challenge, gives an opportunity for a new opportunity. So keep that in mind. It’s all part of your emotional intelligence. The next one is empathy and this is really important and it’s the ability to
Other people. Sweetie sure all the time in our Communications training seek to understand rather than being understood. And I seen my wife do something in training where shall divide the room up into four quadrants and she’ll say, let’s say that corner has green glasses. That corner has red glasses. That corner has blue glasses. He is, he gets them all four different sets of glasses and she said now exchange glasses because Cuz if you don’t exchange glasses, you see life to the color of your perception, but the many you exchange glasses. You begin to understand what that other person was sinking, and that’s empathy. Empathy is not to be judgmental. So many times. We enter a situation already predetermined with judgmental being judgmental and see. This is not a good healthy thing to do.
Yet we do it. It’s to relate to other people and see life from their perspective. And the fifth one is social skills. People with high. Emotional intelligence have great, emotional and communication skills. They know how to communicate with each other and other behaviors Styles. They work well with others. They seek to resolve conflict in Creation, they want to create a win-win.
Process. Because in all negotiation or conflict, resolution or sales or management. If one person wins all the time in the other person lose, it’s not going to be a long-term relationship. Let me give you some signs of low emotional intelligence. And once again, here’s a it’s going to be a place where you can do a personal assessment and here’s a greatest thing and I don’t have time.
Do it in his food podcast. This will probably wind up being a two-parter. There are steps, you can take there are things you can do to improve your emotional intelligence. But what are some of the early signs? What are some of the signs? We need to be careful of? With low emotional intelligence. Number one, people alone, emotional intelligence, always have to be right. They’re you sleep or listeners. They usually have their mind made up in advance. So we’re going into an interaction. They’ve already predetermine the outcome. They predetermine what the other person is sinking. They predetermine what the other said person is going to say. Number two. They don’t have a regard for other people’s feelings. They’re really not concerned about how the person on the other side of the table feels about things.
Number three, they can be insensitive in their comments and I can tell you over the course of years. I’ve had to work very hard on my emotional intelligence because so many times we just say things off the cuff. We say things because they’re funny. They’re cute with no regard. Who am I hurting with this comment? The next one is, they tend to blame others, they don’t hold themselves accountable and when they don’t hold themselves accountable, they think in terms of it’s got to be somebody else’s fault. And so I always recommend this book. I think one of the most powerful books you’ll ever read to improve. Your emotional intelligence is going to be leadership and self-deception by the ARB injure Institute. Let me state that again.
Leadership and self-deception by the ARB injure Institute. And this is a book that will help you understand yourself. Why is it that I don’t accept responsibility. Why is it that one cent, something goes wrong? I start to look for a scapegoat. I remember when I was a football coaching and I became a head football coach and after a ball game.
Win Lose or Draw? I would get my coaches. And I would say before we fixed blame or responsibility on Blown assignments by a player. Let’s make sure we do an assessment. Did we put that kid in position to win? Did we equip that player to be able to execute what we want to execute? So let’s go into business. Did we put our People in a position to win. Then we put our people in a position where they were equipped and well, trained or do we just blame them for the job? That doesn’t get done. Do we, you know, so many times and a lot of times companies will not see a real value in training emotional intelligence and yet it’s one of the foundational pillars in communication and success between People. So, let’s go down to the next one. Number five, they lack coping skills. And what A coping skill is, that’s the ability to deal with an emotional changing situation. They can’t cope with it. Something happens that changes creation of motion, and they lack the ability to adjust and respond. Therefore, they have low in emotional intelligence. The next one is, they can have emotional.
Bursts. Such as anger sarcasm put-downs. These are all signs and signals of low emotional intelligence. So once again, it can be fixed. It can be repaired. It can be improved but you have to make it a focal point. The next one is they struggle with relationships, you know. All relationships in life are give and take I give you take you give I take you meet each other.
People with low emotional intelligence. Take, they struggle with the giving part. And number eight, they tend to want to dominate the conversation now, please don’t misunderstand me here. When I give you these, I’m not pointing the finger at you. I’m saying that collectively, we all have probably been challenged in one, two, or all of these. Well, what are we doing to get better? What are we doing? To improve our emotional intelligence? So let’s talk about the benefits of having.
High emotional intelligence. Number one, you’re always going to create a win-win. Situation. Whether it’s negotiation, whether it’s conflict, resolution, whether its sales account management, collections Business Development management, when you have high emotional intelligence, you create the win-win. Number two, you will reduce conflict. You can’t help but not reduce conflict. When you have emotional intelligence, you’re more concerned about resolving the conflict in winning. The third one is
You will be able to deal better with stress. We all have stress. And the higher your emotional intelligence, the stronger, you are versus stress. This leaves, you will build trust with others. A person that has high, emotional intelligence is trusted by others, which means people feel they can come to you. People feel like they can give you constructive criticism. People feel like you have an open door policy. They’re not going to be injured by you.
The next one is you will improve individual and team performance and productivity. You can’t not improve it. There’s no way you. You will not get more productive as an individual and the team and higher performance with high emotional intelligence. These are all benefits. Another one is you’re going to build teamwork with your clients, with your peers, with the people who work for you with who? Do you work for?
Because yours more collaboration. The next one is, you will encourage the input from others, you know, in front of training rooms all the time, and I’m in front of people, and I coach people, and I’m trying so hard to execute emotional intelligence because I want people to feel comfortable with disagreeing, with me, with asking me the tough question with feeling safe, in that environment. Number 8 is it will encourage creativity, creativity gets stifled. When a person doesn’t feel like you’re working with a person with emotional intelligence. Now, another one is that it’s going to help you with challenges and problems, the higher. Your threshold is with emotional intelligence. The more you Embrace those challenges, you Embrace those problems to find a solution. It’s a challenge. You x-rays, you’re going to reduce anxiety. Nobody likes anxiety. Nobody likes that nervous tissue feel because you don’t know what a person is going to say, how you’re going to react. Well, now you’re going into the business of response. It’s going to create Clarity for you, for your clients, for your teammates, for your coworkers. And next one is it’s going to create a calm – you know, where you have a lot of conflict, a lot of people feel they need to leave that environment. Conflict creates destruction as we move down. It’s going to help you reach resolution once again resolution in your negotiation resolution in. You’re selling resolution your management.
Lucien conflict the whole thing about emotional intelligence. It has a high threshold for resolution. And next one is you’re going to retain where you’re going to attract and retain more clients. If you have high emotional intelligence, people are going to want to work with you. They’re going to want to hire you, they’re going to want to work for you. They’re going to want to be part of what you do. It’s going to help you reduce turnover. You will lose less client, you will lose less good. Quality employees. People want to work in a trust safe environment. If you have a job, it’s going to get you promoted beyond the shadow of a doubt. The higher your emotional intelligence. The more likely you are to move up the corporate ladder. It’s going to help you grow your business. So team now that we know the characteristics of an emotional intelligence, now that we know the low character
Things that will hurt us and having low, emotional intelligence and the benefits. And I promise you in the future. I’ll be going to a deeper dive. I want to give you five tips. Five things that you can do right now to increase and improve your emotional intelligence. Number one, be approachable. Be the kind of person people feel that can come to them and approach them with suggestions ideas. That’s an important one number to maintain a positive attitude. No one wants to interact with a negative person. No one wants to follow, do business with negotiate with the person whose negative the third one be that encourager. You know, I once heard a person say you can be a Taskmaster or an encourager people want to do business with people who are encouragers. The next one is focused on understanding.
Rather than being understood, that is one of the Pinnacles of emotional intelligence. And the biggest one here is find a way in every interaction. Every negotiation, every sale, every conflict resolution every management interaction to create that win-win environment and solution. So, as we wrap this up, hopefully this is giving you some keys and tips on the importance and how How to begin your room. Hold on. Emotional intelligence. I’m going to make an offer to you. Number one. You have my number four. Oh seven nine four, seven, two five nine. Oh, four complimentary cup of joe. My email is [email protected] Do you have any questions about things that you could do to improve your emotional intelligence? Can you reach out to me? I know I can help you because I know what we’d had to go through Joe and Aunt peachy. I know how weak work every day to improve and increase our emotional intelligence. This has been podcast number 255. Take out your phone. We’re so excited about what’s coming up. Type sales edge in your text. Box, one word. Send it to five, five, six, seven, eight. There’s links to our podcasters, free downloads. What we’re really?
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